Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Playing Sims does not prepare you for homeownership.

*Looks over at unpacked boxes and sighs*
*Looks at bare floors and carpet tacks and groans*
*Looks at wallpaper, over paint, over wallpaper, over textured wall, over more wallpaper and goes into murderous rage and starts trying to find the former owners of the house to kill them in a way that would make a CSI go 'What the hell?'

My fiancee and I became homeowners a few weeks ago and are still in the process of fixing the place up. I just finished screwing in face plates a few minutes ago and my better half is showing a cherry tree who's the boss. *I think he's winning due to the pile of branches and grunting*

At times though I wonder what we got myself into with this 30 year purchase. Yeah it shows that we're responsible adults with good credit. But it is also a soul sucking thing that months of Sims playing did not prepare me for.

I'm going to create a new Sims game after this called-Sims: Foreclosure. Your Sim no longer gets a nice, clean, move in ready house...oh no...they get a house where they have to fix stuff that the former owners left behind due to a messy divorce. *At least that's what the neighbor told us*

Like dog stained carpet and the joys of having to rip out the carpet and padding because the former owners let their pets do whatever pets do in the house and all over the house. You also have to work with the fact they put in a crooked wall in your basement mud room, that they had some crazy cable/wiring thing going on all over the house, and that they put wallpaper over wallpaper in more than one room and well they just sucked in general. My fiancee and I agree-we've never met the former owners, but we both hate them and we're glad that their marriage ended in divorce and bankruptcy.

But once all the work is done you have something really awesome to show for it. Like once you get the wallpaper down, the carpet ripped up and the face plates back on it's yours...all yours and it is an awesome feeling. If I wanna re paint a room, I can I don't have to ask the landlord for permission. If I want new trees and flowers....guess what I can have them now. I now reenact that famous Eddie Murphy drunk dad from the barbecue in my kitchen.

"It's my house and if you don't like it you can get the fuck out!"

We still want to murder the former owners for the wallpaper nightmare but we're happy to have a house that will be the site for many game sessions for years to come.